If New Years Resolutions Don’t Work, What Does?

ByMetaphysical Mama December 29, 2020July 4, 2023

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This time of year many of us start to look back on the past year and think about what we have accomplished and what was left undone. We start to think about New Years Resolutions.

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Every year at about this time, I sit down and start to make a list of my New Years Resolutions. I think about what I want my life to look like and what changes I want to make. I excitedly write down all the things I want to do to start my new year off right.

Unfortunately, by February I feel completely discouraged because I have given up on all of my resolutions. Some of them I didn’t even get started on.

So, if New Years Resolutions don’t work, what does?

street sign 2022 and 2023 New Years Resolutions — The new year is an opportunity for a fresh start

Why New Years Resolutions Don’t Work

There are a few reasons that New Years resolutions don’t work. For starters, we make them in January. It is hard to motivate yourself when we don’t even want to get out of bed. For those of us who have cold winters, it is a time to turn inwards and assess our lives, not to go out and start new habits.

The other timing issue with New Years resolutions is that you are putting all your goals off until a later date. If you really want to make lasting changes in your life, if they are important enough, why wait until January 1st to start them? When something is important enough for us to stick to, we don’t want to wait until tomorrow. We want to start today!

Hurry and Pick Some New Years Resolutions! It’s Almost Midnight!

Speaking of important, most of us end up making a list of resolutions that we really didn’t put a whole lot of thought into. We choose our resolutions without taking the time to decide if they are really important to us, and align with our beliefs and values. Sometimes we make resolutions based on what other people think we should change. It’s pretty hard to make major life changes when we have no real stake in the outcome.

New Years resolutions are a big list of big goals. We can’t possibly make that many major changes in our lives in one day. Saying you’re going to get healthy, for example, is a big goal. There are so many different aspects to that one resolution. For example,

Changing our eating habits
Learning what is and isn’t healthy for us
Eliminating unhealthy foods
Learning new recipes
Putting aside the time to make the new recipes we learned
Learn what physical activity works best for us
Get out and do the physical activity that works best for us
Break all our other unhealthy habits

That is a lot of work for one New Years Resolution. Some people have anywhere between five to ten resolutions to tackle at the beginning of a new year. Of course we fall flat!

Making so many resolutions is too overwhelming, so most of us just quit

If Not New Years Resolution, Then What?

So if New Years resolutions don’t work, what can you do? How about trying themes? It sounds so much friendlier then dreaded resolutions or goals. A theme is when you choose a keyword or phrase to summarize what you want to accomplish for the upcoming year. It is your focus for the upcoming year. Doesn’t that sound nice? Some themes could be Health, Abundance, Love and Romance, Family, Career, Bliss or Spirituality. Now, it is important to point out that your theme should align with your core beliefs and current desires. If you spend most of your time daydreaming about having a family then choose Career as your theme, chances are you will not be able to accomplish much. There is a disconnect between your theme and current desires. I’m not saying you should give up your career, but choosing to make family your theme might serve you better.

Choosing a Theme

So how do you choose a theme? This is where you have to do some self reflection. Think about the big picture. Where do you want to see yourself in the future? What do you think about the most? Being healthy and strong? Being in a happy relationship? Spending more time having fun with friends? Having a successful career? Family? That is your starting point. A good idea to further narrow down your theme is to look back at the past year. What did you love? Hate? What do you want less of, more of?

Breaking it Down

Once you have chosen your theme, it’s time to break it down into manageable pieces. Using Family as an example, the first step is to examine where you currently are in your life in regards to family. Do you have a partner? Can you support a family? These may be your first steps to making your dream a reality. Using your theme as a guide, small manageable goals are created to move you towards your ultimate theme.

Checklist If New Years Resolutions Don't Work, What Does? — Break your theme down into manageable goals

Remember when I told you that it would be difficult to accomplish your goals if you are working on your career when what you really want is a family? Well, if you are working on your career as a first step towards preparing to have a family, you are more likely to succeed. It is all about your why. Our minds will help us achieve our goals if they are in line with what we think about most. It’s the Law of Attraction at work.

You may choose to work just on one aspect of your theme at a time. For example, if you are looking to improve your health, you may choose January to focus on letting go of bad habits. February could be all spent working on better eating habits and in March you may decide to introduce physical activity.

You may break your theme up into smaller monthly themes or set monthly, weekly and daily goals for yourself. The choice is yours. However, the more you break down your theme and plan how you will achieve each small step, the more likely you are to succeed. Because you now have an easy to follow plan, with small steps that are much less intimidating than a big major life changing feat, you are more likely to stick to it.

Law of Attraction

Have you ever heard the phrase ‘you get what you think about most’? Well, if you spend enough time thinking about your theme, you are going to make it your reality. You will start to attract the things into your life that you need to make it your reality. By making your intentions clear, you are telling the Universe what you want and the steps you are going to take to get there. Be as specific as you can. The Universe loves clarity and will give you more of what you put out there. So make sure your thoughts and actions are aligned with your desires. You need to feel the way you believe achieving your goals will make feel, right now!

Learn more about the Law of Attraction and the 12 Universal Laws here: How to Make the Law of Attraction Work: The 12 Universal Laws

brain with magnets around it If New Years Resolutions Don't Work What Does? — What you think about most, you attract into your life

Write it Down

Writing things down takes them from the realm of your imagination into the physical world. It is much easier to work with something that is physical, than simply a dream. By writing it down you are creating the plan for taking action. The other bonus of writing things down, is every time we see it we are reminded of what we want to accomplish. Like I told you earlier, the Universe gives us what we think about most, so the more we are thinking about our theme and the steps we need to take, the more the Universe will help us along. Which leads us to the next exercise.

Calligraphy on paper with pen — When you write something down, you take it from a thought form to physical realm

Check out the “Slay Your Goals Planner” here

Create a Vision Board

Another way to keep your objective in your thoughts is to make a vision board. Vision boards are a visual interpretation of our desires. A physical vision board consists of images you’ve cut out of magazines or printed, sprinkled with some keywords and motivational phrases, put together to form a collage of your objective. It is then recommended that you place your vision board where you can look at it often. It helps if you spend some time imagining yourself living the life your vision board depicts. By using visualization, you are creating the feelings associated with your desires. You can also create a digital vision board. For more information read my post How to Create a Vision Board on Pinterest.

Banish Negativity

Recognize Your Negative Thoughts

If you allow negative thoughts to take over, the Law of Attraction will start to provide more experiences that mirror those negative thoughts. So how do you banish negativity? Well it’s not an easy task. You first have to recognize when your thoughts turn negative. Which can be the most difficult part of this process. Most of us have become so used to the negative background banter our egos are spouting, that we don’t even notice it on a conscious level anymore. Our subconscious however, notices and shapes our lives according to that negative self talk. So really listen to what you say to yourself.

Pause and Reframe Your Thoughts

Once you recognize the negative thought, hit pause. Yes I literally mean stop what you’re doing and if you are alone say “pause” out loud. By saying it out loud you are effectively stopping the thought in its tracks. Thank it for showing you what you don’t want. Then replace the thought with something more positive.

When replacing the negative thought, don’t use something that you won’t believe. For example if your inner critic is telling you that you are too stupid to get that promotion at work. Replacing that thought with “Einstein’s got nothing on me!” And strutting across the room might be a little hard for you to believe. If not, you rock! Go with it! However, if you have a hard time accepting that, something that is more believable to you right now might be “I was intelligent enough to get this job, the people who hired me saw my potential and I choose to see it as well.” Reframe your thoughts to the most positive version that you can believe in that moment. The more you change your thoughts, the more you will believe in yourself. You will be able to see yourself as the wonderful person you are.

Gratitude

Practicing gratitude can help orient your feelings with your goals. Gratitude is a high vibration emotion and amazing for manifesting. It is hard to think negatively when you are being thankful. Writing out a list of the things you are grateful for, no matter how small, everyday is a great practice. Do this first thing in the morning while you are getting ready for your day, or while getting ready for bed. That way you can make it a part of your regular routine. Want to know more about Gratitude read my post What’s there to be Grateful for? https://metaphysicalmama.com/whats-there-to-be-grateful-about/

Thank you note — Practice gratitude everyday

Trust the Universe

It is important that once you’ve taken all the above actions, trust that the Universe will provide what you need. It may not happen as quickly as we want it, but it’s vital that you not get discouraged. Otherwise you will only sabotage all of your hard work.

Continue to work through your action plan. Keep your vibrations up and trust that you are manifesting what you need when you need it. Once you are clear on what you want, practicing the feelings that go with what you want, Keeping those desires in your thoughts, keeping your vibrations high and taking inspired action towards those goals, the Universe will help you get there. Trust that the Universe has your back.

Wishing you a Happy New Year full of success, love and joy!

If New Years Resolutions Don't Work, What Does?

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